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When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.The four seasons are: Fire, Flood, Mud and Drought.ORYou can retire to New York City where...You say “the city” and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.You can get into a four-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can’t find Wisconsin on a map.You think Central Park is “nature.”You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multilingual.You’ve worn out a car horn. (IF you have a car.)You think eye contact is an act of aggressionORYou can retire to Minnesota where...You only have three spices: salt, pepper and ketchup.Halloween costumes have to fit over parkas.You have seventeen recipes for casserole.Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.The four seasons are: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road repair.The highest level of criticism is “He is. Rub away. Tell me Miss Gemma, is he doing it properly?” “Oh yes Mr Pete, I can see he is.” Daniel tried for over a minute to come, but he knew that with Gemma watching it was hard enough, and knowing that another man was listening he knew he just would not be able to come. He struggled, and Gemma could see his anguish. “I don’t think he will come Mr Pete” Gemma said. “That is bad Miss Gemma. He can’t be much of a man can he, if he can’t even come. Try looking at Miss Gemma Daniel, and imagine her spanking you, across her lap, does that help?” “This might help” said Gemma as she smacked him hard on the side of his leg, then again, and a third time. Daniel cried out. Yes it helped. Daniel imagined Gemma spanking him as she had done so often before. It really helped. As he pictured her spanking him, and imagined her strict voice scolding him, so he became stiffer and stiffer. He felt Gemma rub his leg again, and then the sharp pain as she smacked him again, and again, and again. He.
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